Cleveland Rocks!

A strumming guitar intro can be heard playing as the camera zeroes in on a pair of ATM machines…

All this energy callin’ me,
Back where it comes from,

Gavin Taylor approaches one such ATM, the other being met by his agent, Ava St. Claire. Both of them complete a quick transaction before turning towards each other. Gavin volleys Ava to the side before slipping off on his own in the opposite direction, but not without a spin. As they move, a cast of characters carry on with similar male/female routines.

It’s such a crude attitude,
It’s back where it belongs.

The scene transitions to nighttime in the parking lot of Rocket Mortgage FieldHouse, the location of SCW Breakdown and home of the Cleveland Cavaliers. Gavin stands perched atop his limousine lip syncing the song, a clear homage (or parody?) of 90s TV show, The Drew Carey Show, and it’s potentially iconic (if not ironic) introduction.

All the little chicks with the crimson lips go
Cleveland Rocks, Cleveland Rocks

The parking lot is full of tailgaters

She’s livin’ in sin with a safety pin goin’
Cleveland Rocks, Cleveland Rocks, Cleveland Rocks, Cleveland Rocks,
Cleveland Rocks, Cleveland Rocks, Cleveland Rocks, Cleveland Rocks.

Gavin: “Ohio!”

---

“What do you mean “it didn’t post”?”

Gavin Taylor paced around the office of his agent, Ava St. Claire, completely incredulous. Ava, to her credit, didn’t know what to tell him.

“I don’t know,” she responds, her eyes affixed to her monitor as she seeks some kind of answer. “We went live over Twitter last night and now… gone!”

“Well what does it say?” Gavin asks.

“Something about “Rate Limit Exceeded”,” Ava remarks, though she wasn’t entirely certain of what that meant. Gavin shakes his head, thinking about what was lost.

“So the musical number?” he asks.

“Gone!”

“The masterful To Be or Not To Be soliloquy?”

“Not to be,” Ava remarks somewhat cheekily. This is a serious matter, but there was still room for clever quips.

“The puppet love scene?” Gavin appears most heartbroken by that loss…

“Gavin,” Ava looks to him in a frank matter. “I told you we had neither the time, resources, nor budget to include that.”

“Right,” Gavin responds. “So that’s it? Twitter lost my match promotion?”

“Lost to cyberspace, I’m afraid,” Ava confirms. Gavin can only shake his head.

“If you can’t trust billionaires,” he begins… “Who can you trust?”

~fin~